'Twas the night before Christmas and Santa’s a Wreck.....
How to live in a world that is politically correct ?
His workers would no longer answer to "Elves",
"Vertically Challenged" they were calling themselves.
And labour conditions at the North Pole
Were alleged by the union, to stifle the soul.
Four reindeer had vanished, without much
Released to the wild by the Humane Society.
And gifts: nothing of leather, and nothing of fur,
Which meant nothing for him. And nothing for her.
Nothing that might be construed to pollute.
Nothing to aim. Nothing to shoot.
Nothing that clamored or made a lot of noise.
Nothing for just girls. Nothing for just boys.
Nothing that claimed to be gender specific.
Nothing that’s warlike or non-pacific.
He tried to be merry, he tried to be gay,
But you have to be careful with that word today.
His sack was quite empty, limp to the ground;
Nothing fully acceptable was to be found.
Something special was needed, a gift that he might
Give to all without angering the left or the right.
A gift that would satisfy, with no indecision,
Each group of people, every religion;
Every ethnicity, every hue,
Everyone, everywhere....even you.
So here is that gift, its price beyond worth....
"May you and your loved ones enjoy peace on Earth."